Believe it or not, one of my most intense relationships was with someone who lived over 1,300 miles away from me. We chatted casually online for a while until things got serious, but the whole time we both felt held back by the limitations that our distance put on us. There’s only so much phone sex you can have before things start to get annoyingly unsatisfying. We wanted to feel each other’s body movements in real time, but most of our sex toys didn’t have the features to support that kind of action. We were forced to make a tough decision: Either break up and find someone closer in proximity or search high and low for the best long-distance sex toys. You can probably guess what we ended up doing.
Fast-forward through countless bouts of trial and error to find my long-lost lover and I still going strong despite our differences in distance and desire. In fact, high-tech and/or interactive sex toys for couples wound up being the saving grace in our relationship – basically the only reason we’ve stayed together this long. Chat sessions and picture swaps are great, but they’ll never inspire long-lasting connections the way reaching orgasm in unison will. So, regardless of other people’s opinions on the state of our affair, we allowed the intuitive and innovative sex toy industry to take control of our love life. The resulting union has been not only intense but also fulfilling, satisfying and (in many ways) better than the sexual bonds I’ve had with my in-person partners over the years.
You know what they say, “Love knows no bounds.” I completely agree with that statement, and most folks who have been in love before will agree with it too. The thing is: The person you’re meant to be with at this moment may not be standing right in front of you as we speak. Our planet is a big place, so finding your favorite fuck buddy may require some creativity. Thanks to advancements in technology and communications, though, it’s now easier than ever to meet someone from the other side of the world without ever having to formulate a complex plot to make it happen. I guess it’s a small world after all.
But what happens when two people from opposite sides of the globe find each other sexually attractive and want to express those feelings in an organic way? Plane tickets and passports are a whole lot more expensive than long-distance sex toys, I’m just sayin’. I do understand, however, that not everyone is aware of what a long-distance sex toy is (and isn’t) or what it does (and doesn’t do). As sad as that is, the lack of knowledge is probably because nobody really talks about these things, much less gives helpful information to those in need. It’s nearly impossible to enjoy this new-fangled type of technology if you have no idea what’s going on, so you’d think sex toy manufacturers would do a better job of getting the facts straight. Unfortunately, that’s just not the way things are.
On the bright side, the process of picking out the best option isn’t too difficult once you know what you’re doing. Just be sure to prepare yourself for what’s about to happen, because today’s market is flooded with choices and they’re not all as amazing as the manufacturer makes them out to be. You’ll need to know a few things in order to avoid getting tricked, ripped off and/or disappointed in the end. Essentially, your long-distance relationship can be just as hot and steamy as you need it to be, but a few tools are required to get the job done right. Here’s what you need to know.
- What Is a Sex Toy For Long-Distance Relationships?
- Why a Long-Distance Sex Toy Though?
- The Top 6 Ways to Tell If That Long Distance Sex Toy Is Worth It or Not
- The Top 5: My Best Long-Distance Sex Toys
- BEST OVERALL: The Kiiroo Onyx 2 & Fuse Set
- BEST FOR MEN: The Fleshlight Launch
- BEST FOR WOMEN: The OhMiBod Fuse
- BEST UNISEX DEVICE: The We-Vibe Sync
- BEST ON A BUDGET: The Kiiroo Titan & Fuse Set
What Is a Sex Toy For Long-Distance Relationships?
Defining this stuff is just as important as knowing that it exists in the first place, so don’t skip this part just because you think you have it all figured out. A long-distance sex toy is basically just a couple’s pleasure device – something you’re probably familiar with already. The only difference is that LD toys feature extremely high-tech components which allow users to enjoy various settings and sensations in real time with a partner who’s not in the same room. Imagine feeling what your lover is feeling; or better yet, imagine being directly responsible for the quality and duration of their orgasm despite your proximity to them. This is some space-age shit right here.
Sex toys for long-distance love come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes, with connective options available in nearly every variety of sex toy on today’s market. In other words, you can get LD dildos, vibrators, prostate massagers, male masturbators and just about everything in between if you know where to shop and what to look for. No longer do we have to manually masturbate using our hands and imaginations only. It’s seriously a great time to be alive, because these kinds of sex toys are building bridges were centuries-long gaps once stood. So, do you have what it takes to support this shift in humanity’s sexual reach or will you crawl back into your hole until you die of dissatisfaction? There’s really only one way to find out.
To determine whether you should even be considering these types of toys or not, ask yourself the following questions:
- Have my partner or I ever used a high-tech, long-distance sex toy (LDST) before?
- What was my/our experience with it?
- Was there anything we did or didn’t like about using an LDST?
- How would we do things differently if we tried using one again?
- Do I have the right knowledge and/or equipment to support this high-tech toy?
- Is my data or internet connection secure or shared?
- What are the streaming limits of my smart device or PC?
- Do I know how to connect everything and get it going or will I need instructions from the manufacturer?
- What skin types are in play here?
- Does anyone have an allergy to certain materials?
- Will some materials and/or substances cause irritation?
- Is there a specific kind of personal lubricant I/we have to use during sex or mutual masturbation?
- How do my partner and I connect the best?
- Are you hottest when dirty chatting or turned on more by visual stimulation?
- Is watching pornography an option in your relationship?
- Do you enjoy roleplaying or dabbling in BDSM games?
- What’s my budget for a long-distance sex toy?
- Did I take the cost of maintenance and accessories into account?
- Do I need a device that comes with everything or can I afford to buy add-on parts and/or compatible toys for my partner?
- Would a manufacturer’s warranty be helpful in my situation?
Don’t be discouraged if you feel defeated when answering all those questions. And don’t give up just because going through them seems to disqualify you. Keep in mind that LDSTs are not for everybody. Okay, that’s a lie. They’re even a logical choice for traditional couples who just want to make things more interesting. And even if you don’t have a lot of knowledge or equipment to support the purchase, just know that the best devices make integrating into the future a piece of cake. In fact, there are plenty of good reasons why long-distance sex toys are a terrific option for any couple, regardless of their address.
Why a Long-Distance Sex Toy Though?
The many advantages of using an LDST become clear when you’ve got one in your hands. However, the people who have yet to buy one can’t exactly determine the value thereof because the modern-day market is 1) plagued with cleverly misleading advertisements and 2) inundated with lackluster devices that leave much to be desired. Nobody wants to waste their money on something they won’t use. Fortunately, diligent shopping can lead you to benefit from a long-distance sex toy in the following five ways:
- Your Orgasms Are Intensified
By using a high-quality sex toy made specifically for couples who live far away from each other, the quality and duration of your sexual climaxes is greatly intensified. Manufacturers take special care to develop ergonomic devices with features that support ease-of-use during long-distance interactions. With things like virtual reality, pre-programmed porn content, live visual feeds through online platforms, Bluetooth connections and smart phone apps, today’s LDSTs are ready and willing to take you and your partner to the heights of sexual pleasure with the press of a button.
- Your Intimacy Is Elevated
When you and your partner can express your sexual desires for one other in a healthy and satisfying way, it instantly enhances intimacy in the relationship. LDSTs provide the kind of convenience that allows you both to be as spontaneous as you want to be. Act out fantasies and push boundaries as you build a bond that stands the test of time and distance. Without a good long-distance sex toy in the mix, however, that’s nearly impossible.
- Your Experiences Are Customized
The best long-distance couple’s toys offer unique modes of customization for the people who buy them. Available now is everything from tailored texturizations on male masturbator sleeves to personally selected dildo features for the ladies. Today’s sex toy maker wants to give you everything you want, but you have to know what that is to get it. And because customization is such a big deal these days, many LDSTs have features that adjust themselves to the user’s preferences over time. Yes, that means it’s possible to use a sex toy that’s smarter and more in tune with your body than your last partner.
- Your Dating Pool Gets Deeper
Because sex toys with long-distance capabilities have changed the game, your dating options are more expansive than ever. Meet, greet and get dirty with a lover from far away or start a new fling with a stranger from another country. Support the monogamy of your current union by using a couples-friendly sex toy with plenty of high-tech, interactive features to explore, or flirt and fuck your favorite porn stars if relationships aren’t your thing. My point is: There are just too many fish in the sea for some people to cast their nets out their front door, if you know what I mean.
- Your Imagination Runs Wild
Intuitive and innovative features help you and/or your partner conjure up more perverted ways to experience orgasm. Limited by the confines of space and time, you two love birds probably haven’t had a chance to do many of the dirty things running through your head. A properly selected and utilized sex toy for long-distance couples might be just what the doctor ordered if you think about it. How else do you plan to make your partner cum from where you’re sitting right now? Just a friendly reminder: Your dick pics and pussy shots are getting old and they’re certainly not inspiring new ideas.
Understanding the benefits of incorporating an LDST into your relationship is crucial to finding the right one, do you realize that? If you don’t know what one of these devices is designed to do, it’s virtually impossible to enjoy all the features you’re about to encounter. Take it from an old pro like me; appreciating the beauty in something is the best way to keep it in good working order. Just don’t tell my ex I said that.
The Top 6 Ways to Tell If That Long Distance Sex Toy Is Worth It or Not
Picking out the perfect long-distance sex toy also requires a close consideration of the following six things:
- The Size
Whether you’re using this new sex toy during a solo mission or with a live partner, the sizes of its components will determine how you use it and how much pleasure you derive from it. Devices that are too large usually end up very difficult to maneuver or enjoy, while excessively small toys either break, get lost, fail to produce orgasms or all of the above. Find out what’s appropriate for you and/or your partner before selecting a toy. Look at its insertable length, internal length, girth and diameter as it relates to your anatomy.
- The Shape
Shape is everything when it comes to using a sex toy, especially one that’s made specifically for couples who like orgasms from a distance. Consider the proportions of your bodies and familiarize yourself with the locations of your g-spot, p-spot, perineum, clitoris, and other erogenous zones. In the process, make yourself comfortable with sexual exploration so you can freely enjoy all the features of the toy you choose. Remember, certain shapes are more ideal for certain types of sex. In general, for example, curved devices are better for internal stimulation and straight toys are best for external pleasures.
- The Features
Most people don’t forget to look at the features of the toys they’re considering. However, some things are more important than others. For LDSTs especially, features like Bluetooth compatibility, virtual reality capabilities, smart phone apps, wireless remote controls and Sync-based technologies are sought-after the most for obvious reasons. Just be sure to check out things like the button control quality and placement, the settings ranges, and device ergonomics as a whole while you’re at it. Miss out on those features because the other ones look extra exciting and you could end up with something you don’t even like.
- The Required Equipment
When it comes to using interactive, long-distance sex toys with a partner, it’s important to have all the necessary equipment at your disposal ahead of time. Usually, these kinds of toys call for things like an internet connection, a data plan, or an online content club membership of some kind. Look at the manufacturer’s website, read the product’s label, or browse some honest buyer reviews to find out whether your dirty dungeon is all set up and ready to go (or not). If your tools are lacking, see if the manufacturer offers any of the compatible accessories and/or equipment that you need.
- The Materials
I can’t stress this enough: The materials on your sex toy are as important as the textures, the features, the size, the shape and damn near everything else. Why? Because materials can determine what kind of lube you have to use, which partners you can enjoy the device with, how much preparation you have to do to begin using it, and whether post-orgasm cleanup is easy or not. Stick with skin-safe, lube-friendly materials like silicone, thermoplastic elastomer (TPE), polyvinyl chloride (PVC), stainless-steel, glass or a patented blend.
- The Manufacturer
Certain sex toy makers don’t play well with others. On the contrary, some manufacturers have started teaming up to develop highly versatile products that perform like pros under peer pressure. Brands such as Fleshlight, Kiiroo, Lelo and We-Vibe have taken integration to new heights, with a whole host of couples-friendly toys that are interchangeable with one other and powerful across time zones. Depending on what/who you want to have sex with, the original creator of the device will play a significant role in whether you can pull off that fantasy, so choose wisely and don’t forget about team spirit.
The Top 5: My Best Long-Distance Sex Toys
Now that you’ve been taught how to distinguish between the good, the bad and the ugly, check out these five amazing sex toys for long-distance couples. Many of them have been featured in top publications, discussed on television or even recommended by respected relationship therapists.
BEST OVERALL: The Kiiroo Onyx 2 & Fuse Set
This dynamic device may look sleek, sexy and sophisticated, but it’s a dirty SOB in all the right ways. The Kiiroo Onyx 2 is already the world’ best teledildonic masturbator, but when paired with an equally communicative sex toy, it’s has the power to catapult you into the heights of pleasure. Aesthetically and technologically pleasing, the KO2 offers up to 140 strokes per minute and uses the famous Fleshlight brand’s patented SuperSkin material for a sensationally realistic feel. It has a generous internal length of 6.5 inches and is stuffed inside an ergonomic, lightweight casing that houses a powerful yet rechargeable lithium-ion polymer battery. On top of that, it
PRO: This thing can be synced with so many different toys (for both men and women) that it’s probably the most user-friendly and versatile product in the industry.
CON: It takes four to six hours to get a full charge but the device will only run for a maximum of one hour.
BEST FOR MEN: The Fleshlight Launch
The interactive Launch is like nothing you’ve ever seen and I can guarantee it. Despite the fact that it has a few minor design flaws because it’s the first of it’s kind, this magic machine still lets you sit back and relax while the orgasms are delivered directly to your dick at up to 180 strokes per minute. It has a manual mode too, and either one can be connected to a digital media platform that’s filled with nasty, graphic porn content – all VR-ready and Bluetooth compatible. USB rechargeable and a lot lighter than it looks, the fabulous FL uses intuitive swipe controls to adjust stroke speeds and lengths to suit your desires. Enjoy the ergonomics of this futurist sex toy as the connected webcam streams your partner’s reactions in the background (hopefully while they use a compatible toy at the same time).
PRO: This marvel is compatible with any full-sized Fleshlight brand male masturbator model, plus it can be used with the Kiiroo Onyx 2 or Pearl 2 as well.
CON: The male masturbator is not included with the device.
EXPERT TIP: Combine a Fleshlight Girls masturbator sleeve with the matching porn content to enjoy a hyper-realistic experience.
BEST FOR WOMEN: The OhMiBod Fuse
They say the future is now, or at least that’s what the maker of the OhMiBod Fuse claims when they refer to the design perfection of their newest couples-friendly long-distance love machine. This app-controlled sex toy takes interactive adult entertainment to the next level, with 7 different vibe settings to explore at the touch of a built-in button. As the world’s most luxurious interactive rabbit dildo, the makers of the Kiiroo Onyx and Fleshlight Launch masturbators have joined forces to promote long-distance relationship health and happiness through high-tech marital aids like this one. Connect wirelessly and use the app to transmit your movements in real time as you slide the 5-inch, USB rechargeable, silicone shaft in and out of your pussy like a pro. Enjoy blended orgasms as your partner enjoys you; it’s as simple as that.
PRO: This thing features a touch-sensitive mode that only vibrates when it comes in contact with your skin, further enhancing the kink you can communicate to your partner.
CON: The size of this rabbit vibrator may not be large enough for some users, nor is it ideal for anal penetration.
BEST UNISEX DEVICE: The We-Vibe Sync
This magnificent mechanism is ideal for men and women, designed to hug the g-spot or stimulate the p-spot depending on how you use it. Best of all, its slim and wearable for the long-term, plus it has a special shape to tantalize the clitoris or perineum at the same time. Control the settings with the wireless remote control that has a 3-meter range or download the free We-Connect app and link it to your WiFi for long-distance allure. The app-controlled We-Vibe Sync features Touch Mode (AKA: real-time touchscreen functionality) and Beat Mode (AKA: rhythmic syncing with your favorite jams), not to mention it’s fully rechargeable and suited to enable interaction sessions between performers and their fans (AKA: porn stars and partners). Not bad for a waterproof long-distance sex toy that fits snugly inside a compact storage case.
PRO: All Bluetooth-enabled WE-Vibe devices are compatible with this interactive platform.
CON: The 3-inch insertable length may not be substantial enough for some users.
BEST ON A BUDGET: The Kiiroo Titan & Fuse Set
Give manual masturbation a break in exchange for the new Kiiroo Titan and your sex life will never be the same again. It features 9 powerful motors and can be synced with your phone and/or your partner’s compatible device for a long-distance session that rivals the real thing. Use it to enjoy your favorite porn performances or skim through the 7 distinct pre-set stroke patterns and speeds as you bask in the toy’s superb teledildonic presence. It features a uniquely textures sleeve made by Fleshlight and it can accommodate penises up to 8.5 inches in length. Best of all, this budget-friendly sex toy for long-distance couples is compatible with VR and erotic media too, with a USB rechargeable battery and a lightweight, user-friendly design as the cherry on top.
PRO: It’s an affordable, travel-friendly alternative to the much larger Launch device and it’s just as high-tech and interactive.
CON: The buttons are built in to the device itself, with no wireless remote control provided for short-distance play.
The End Game
Back in the day, long-distance relationships were not only difficult they were also void of any sexual contact whatsoever. And because of their awkwardness, LD unions were frowned upon until just recently. The age of information has given us access to all of mankind’s collective wisdom, but don’t forget that our sexuality is a big part of that. Keep your eyes on the prize and don’t let miles and minutes get the best of you. The only thing that matters is that you and your partner have a safe and satisfying sexual experience with this machine (hopefully more than once). If that takes a fully automated, virtual reality ready, Bluetooth compatible love machine, then so be it. You’ve got better things to do than worry about what other people think. Besides, your crotch doesn’t seem to care about distance, so why do you?
I’m Rori. I’m glad you’re here with me on this crazy journey.
Since this is a sex blog, most of the content relates to the men (and women) in my life. I’ve divided my life over the last five years into little “chapters” to help you catch up on the story and the cast of characters involved.