I’ve been using rabbit vibrators since I first started masturbating without a partner. Sick of how unsatisfying my sex life was, I searched and scoured the internet for the best and brightest sex toys only to make a myriad of mistakes along the way. Can I just say before we get started that I’m even more sick and tired of the bullshit than you are? Ok, so maybe we’re on the same boat, but at least neither one of us is alone.
I wanted to find the best rabbit vibrator to use alone at home after a partner I broke up with had used one on me during our 9-month relationship (or whatever you want to call that nightmare). The only good thing about the entire union was the sex, but I learned more about my body over the course of that rollercoaster than I had in the decades leading up to it. The takeaway: Well-made rabbit vibrators can make a wonderful substitute for a shitty partner who doesn’t understand the simple concept of respect. In hindsight, it’s also a great addition to an already happy union, but of course, I like to learn things the hard way.
Since my graduation from Sex Ed, I’ve kept a rabbit vibrator by my bedside every night. It’s been the saving grace on many cold and lonely nights, plus it’s helped push the envelope on the relationships I’ve been in over the years. My little Bugs Bunny made it possible to quickly weed out the weirdos while wooing the winners and, because of that, it’s been one of the best investments I’ve made in myself thus far and you’re about to understand why. But first, let me make sure we’re all talking about the same thing here.
What Is a Rabbit Vibrator?
It’s not hard to understand what a rabbit vibrator is (and isn’t), nor is it difficult to pick one out of a lineup of other sex toys. Rabbit vibrators look usual when compared to modern-day dildos, especially if that dildo is made to look super realistic. Because of the unique features of today’s best rabbit vibes, however, manufacturers tend to sell twice as many units as conventional dildos and bullet vibes combined.
The product’s not-so-surprising popularity most likely stems from the overall design. With soft, pliable ear-like nubs that tickle and tease the edges and top of the clit, rabbit vibrators produce a completely different kind of orgasm than simple penetration. However, a lot of RVs come attached to a full-sized dildo for dual stimulation. On the other hand, rabbit vibrators are compact and versatile enough to perform the same kinds of miracles even as a stand-alone product.
And while we’re here, it’s also important to note that modern-day rabbit vibrators come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes, with an even longer list of features available and accessories compatible. To figure out which rabbit vibrators you should be looking at, consider the following things about yourself:
- Your Sex Life
It’s of the upmost importance to think about how you intend to use this new rabbit vibrator of yours. What is your sex life like right now? Are you trying to incorporate a new toy into an already good thing or are you using this new plaything to spice it up a bit? Depending on your intensions, the right rabbit will have different features.
If you plan to use this toy as an add-on to your existing sex life, I suggest getting one that’s made for couple’s play. Those models will likely be the ones with high-tech features and a high rate of compatibility with other sex toys, accessories or online platforms. As for my friends looking for something to make things more interesting in the bedroom, opting for devices with couples-friendly features is also a good idea, but you’ll probably want something that can be customized too. If you plan to masturbate alone with the rabbit, go for one a model with the vibe functions and settings you like the most and forget about what anyone else thinks.
- Your Skin Type
The skin you’re in should play a huge role in the rabbit vibrator you ultimately pick. Most of the higher-end models are made using hypoallergenic (or skin-safe) materials, but that’s not always the case. If you’re one of those women who has sensitivities to certain chemicals or manufacturing products, pay close attention to this detail while shopping for your next (or first) rabbit vibe.
To keep things as easy and painless as possible, try to look for RVs that are made from materials such as silicone, PVC plastic, TPE or a type of polycarbonate. Always stay away from anything that has phthalates and only go near products with latex if you don’t have an allergy. Remember that each material has unique properties and thus requires a different maintenance routine. Whatever the case, the most important factor should be your safety.
- Your Lube Stash
I try not to talk about lubrication too much but it’s nearly impossible when speaking on sex toys. Do not – I repeat – do no use your rabbit vibrator without a good lube. Ample lubrication will make the vibrations much more intense and wide-spreading, not to mention it will prevent skin irritation, cut back on toy damage, and decrease vaginal dryness while also moisturizing the skin and making every sensation ten times more noticeable. In other words, lube is worth considering since you’ll be using lots of it with your new rabbit vibrator. For your convenience, I’ve made a lube selection guide to help you figure out which one is best for your skin type and toy choice.
- Your Budget
I’d like everyone reading this to remember one thing: Price is not always indicative of value. Overzealous and overly-confidence sex toy manufacturers are happy to overcharge consumers for underwhelming products. At the same time, humble and helpful companies often offer reasonably priced devices that work like a dream. I’m telling you all this because I don’t want anyone getting trapped inside an expensive marketing trick.
Have a budget in mind before shopping, but be prepared for some surprises. The more features you want, the more money you’re bound to spend. And don’t forget about the cash you’ll need for things like batteries (if it’s not rechargeable), lube (if you don’t already have some) and toy cleaner (if it doesn’t come with any). Your sex life and body are both worthy investments, so don’t be afraid to spend a little more money than you initially expected if the situation calls for it.
Why a Rabbit Vibrator Though?
There are several reasons why owning a good rabbit vibrator is so legit. For one, masturbation is a healthy pastime that’s appropriate for every man and woman in the world, whether they’re in a relationship or not. For two, it doesn’t make you a creep; even famous people do it. Your mom did it, your dad did, Abraham Lincoln did it and your favorite school teacher probably did too. In fact, there are more masturbation quotes on the internet than there are quotes about parenthood, the workforce or illness. Don’t believe me? Here’s one of my favorites:
The good thing about masturbation is that you don’t have to get dressed up for it. -Truman Capote
They say good masturbation requires either good skills, good tools or a good mixture of both. I say whoever said that must have had plenty of experience doing it, especially considering how wide-ranging the sensations of masturbation can be. Whether male or female (or somewhere in between), the key to adequately satisfying masturbation is to have all the important components in hand (pardon the pun) before ever pulling your pants down. And considering how far we’ve come as a species, let’s not revert back to the not-so-golden days of masturbation simply because we refuse to do our homework.
You flunkies aught to know that, back in the day, men and women had to masturbate using some pretty odd stuff. There are historical records depicting people waxing their own crescents with things like moldy bread and sculptured chalk. And while those inventions probably felt good at the time, mankind eventually discovered the pitfalls. Bread-based fifis and chalk-based dildos galore, unhappily horny people still wanted more than simple penetration. Fast-forward a few thousand years and we now have sex toys like the vibrating rabbit to keep us happy.
These relatively curious-looking devices have become a staple in the sex toy industry since their inception in the late 1970s or so. Preceded by a large number of rudimentary dildos and vibrating love wands, the rabbit vibrator finally gave credence to the clitoris – a virtually unknown and drastically underappreciated part of the female body. Before that, it was widely believed that women didn’t even ejaculate during sex and were merely receptacles for male sperm. Prescribed by doctors for things like insomnia, irritability and (oddly enough) smoking cessation, dildos and vibrators were thought of as health-supporting luxury items, not everyday-use playthings with internet access.
Today’s female sex toys are geared more towards actually doing their jobs as opposed to simply appeasing cranky ladies. The best models are known for providing intense pleasure from the inside out, whether by attacking the newly discovered clitoris or by penetrating the vaginal and/or anal canal to stimulate the g-spot or p-spot. Among the most popular self-pleasure toys for women are, of course, the rabbit vibrators because of their unique ability to stimulate all erogenous zones responsible for the female orgasm. I don’t know about you, but all I can think is: “It’s about damn time!”
I mean, I can’t believe it’s taken the world this long to acknowledge the fact that women like to bust a nut just as much as the next guy (literally). Since the dawn of time, girls have been double-clicking their own mouse with a wide variety of homemade tools. Precision masturbatory rituals exist all over the globe, with women as the grand architect. Simply put, we’re all perverts deep down, it’s just that the industry has made it easier for some people to discover that than others. A good rabbit vibrator will bring out the freak that’s been hiding in your sheets.
Somewhere, there’s someone who’s masturbation ritual ends with them setting up ventriloquist dummies facing the bed. I mean, someone else. – Dana Gould
So, now matter how freaky or finicky you happen to in bed right now, a well-made rabbit vibrator might very well change all that, even after only a few uses. Personally, until I felt a decent clitoral orgasm I had no idea I could squirt or experience orgasm for several minutes on end. By providing more than the basic sensations of penetration, rabbit vibrators seem to create whole-body pleasure that generates ejaculate from the far reaches of your soul. I don’t know how else to put it.
The Top 3 Ways to Tell If That Rabbit Vibrator Is Worth It or Not
The best-feeling and most durable rabbit vibrators on today’s market are the ones that come attached to a full-sized dildo. Handheld, travel-sized and finger vibes all have their merits, but none of them would qualify as the best of anything besides convenience. For the purposes of this buyer’s guide, we’ll only talk about the models that offer dual stimulation because, let’s face, it’s what we all want anyway.
Meanwhile, here are the top three things you need to look at or consider when shopping for your next (or first) rabbit vibrator sex toy:
As with anything that’s going to touch or (especially) enter your body, the size matters. Like I said, most rabbit vibes come attached to a full-sized dildo or vibrating shaft. However, the size of that shaft and its attached rabbit will vary widely in size, shape and functionality. Smaller rabbits will pinpoint a certain spot on your clit while larger rabbits will offer a wider surface area, thereby stimulating more of the vaginal area. Keep in mind, however, that a rabbit vibrator’s main objective is to generate a clitoral orgasm, so the size of the shaft itself doesn’t matter so much unless you need to be penetrated at the same time to reach a proper climax.
Look for a rabbit vibrator that’s big enough to encompass the entire area but not so large that it misses the sweet spot. Usually, about 1 to 3 inches should suffice for most vaginas. Longer and/or shorter versions are available (often in similar models too), so don’t be afraid to take some measurements so you can be super picky about the size of your new vibe. I know from personal experience that my vag measures 1.87 inches long and that my clit is located just under the one-inch mark. There, that’s a thing you know now. Do I need to keep going?
The primary features of any clitoral stimulator will be about the same given the fact that a rabbit vibrator inherent design uses nearly identical engineering. Things like “rabbit ears” and other vibrating tendrils are the name of the game. Some sex toy manufacturers even have several rabbit-like vibrators that are designed to look like other animals such as butterflies and birds. Whatever species your rabbit vibrator is, the most important thing is that it has all the features you want on it.
Depending on what you want this ne toy for, the best features usually include things like wide ranging vibration functions, distinctive speed settings, intensity controls and sometimes even remote controls. Look for industry-leading technologies such as motion sensing, sync to music, and USB rechargeable batteries too, especially if you’re one of the people who said they wanted to use the rabbit to instigate more fervent passion in your love life. Modern-day rabbit features are deep and wide, so don’t be afraid to spend some time on this one while playing with different ideas and fantasies.
We are living in a material world, so there’s really nothing wrong with being a material girl. And considering this rabbit is going to most likely burrow up inside you, it makes perfect sense for it to be made from the best materials money can buy. You’ll find several options on today’s sex toy market, but the best ones are typically made using high-grade materials such as silicone, TPE, polycarbonate, PVC plastic or another type of elastomer. Few are made with latex and even fewer with phthalates, which is a very good thing considering what scientists have recently learned about that nasty stuff. Stay alert, sisters, because many manufacturers add phthalates into the mix because it makes the material more pliable.
BONUS CONSIDERATIONS: Ergonomics and Compatibility
Because you will be holding onto your rabbit with one hand (or having a partner hold onto it if you’re lucky) it’s overall body shape and design will affect how much pleasure you get from it and how easy it is to use. Furthermore, some of the best modern-day rabbit vibrators are actually compatible with other devices. If you’re planning to get freaky with you lover, check out those models first. They may be slightly more expensive but they’re definitely worth it.
The Three Kings: My Best Rabbit Vibrators In 2019:
I know that finding the perfect rabbit vibrator is harder than a big dick, but that doesn’t mean there’s no hope. Here are the devicesI consider to be the top three in all the land:
#1 – The LELO Soraya
Hailed as the ultimate rabbit vibrator, the LELO Soraya is the sleekest and sexiest female love wand on the market thus far. It features a silky-smooth silicone body with a polished metal opening that’s ergonomically designed for an easy grip regardless of your hand position. With built-in controls that cycle through 8 different pleasure settings, this powerful rabbit vibrator looks nothing like what you’d expect. Sans the corny “rabbit ears” and using a modern clitoral nub instead, the futuristic Soraya is waterproof and rechargeable too. As the sexiest-looking and most intuitively designed rabbit vibe in the industry, this bad boy charges quickly, comes with a satin storage bag (as is the hallmark of the LELO brand, by the way), and delivers strong vibrations while remaining as silent as a criminal on Cops.
PRO: It comes with a 1-year manufacturer’s warranty and can stimulate the g-spot and clitoris at the same time.
CON: The ergonomic loop handle may not fit all hand sizes.
#2 – The WE-Vibe Nova
BEST FOR COUPLES
Rechargeable, app-controlled and Bluetooth compatible, the couples-friendly We-Vibe Nova designed to solve the problem of losing clitoral contact while thrusting. With a body-hugging arch and a perfectly curved tip, this thing syncs up with the We-Vibe smart device app to offer real-time stimulation to you and your partner. With 10 vibration settings already programmed into the device, each one has adjustable intensity levels and, when used with the free app, can all be further tailored to your pussy’s prissy specifications. That’s a limitless variety of customizable patterns, ladies and gents. Plus, it utilizes Feel Technology and Feel Performer Technology – both of which allow for interactive sex sessions between lovers regardless of distance or location.
PRO: The We-Vibe Nova is aptly sized for all user levels and comes with a 1-year manufacturer’s warranty.
CON: Without a good Bluetooth connection and reliable smart device, the couples-friendly features are pretty much worthless. Get with the times, folks.
#3 – The LELO INA Wave
BEST FOR BEGINNERS
The LELO brand is always a top-seller, but their INA Wave vibrating rabbit dildo is globally favored as the best in the biz. Fully rechargeable and 100% waterproof, this sleek and sexy shaft features a silky-soft silicone skin that works perfectly with any water-based lube. Aside from a curved head and built-in controls, it has 10 distinct pleasure settings that range from a tantalizing murmur to an intense pulse. This bad boy also features an ergonomic handle for variant positioning and offers WaveMotion Technology for semi-hands-free stimulation.
PRO: The LELO INA Wave uses the industry-standard rabbit vibe design but without all the nooks and crannies that can carry bacteria, thus making it superior in user-friendliness and ideal for beginners.
CON: It may not be long enough for women with deep g-spots
The End Game
Your search for the best rabbit vibrator doesn’t have to end in disappointment. Consider your personal needs and then sort through the various features of each option until you find the one you want. If that takes a 6-inch vibrating rabbit with a 10-function motor and a rechargeable battery inside a smooth, waterproof silicone skin, then so be it. After centuries of the female orgasm being denied an existence, it’s time for the ladies to start having some fun.
I’m Rori. I’m glad you’re here with me on this crazy journey.
Since this is a sex blog, most of the content relates to the men (and women) in my life. I’ve divided my life over the last five years into little “chapters” to help you catch up on the story and the cast of characters involved.